"The No. 1 Song In Heaven (Part Two)"



If you should die before you wake
If you should die while crossing the street
The song that you'll hear, I guarantee

It's number one, all over heaven
It's number one, all over heaven
It's number one, all over heaven
The number one song all over heaven

The one that's the rage up here in the clouds
Loud s a crowd or soft as a doubt
Lyrically weak, but the music's the thing

Gabriel plays it,
God how he plays it
Gabriel plays it,
God how he plays it
Gabriel plays it,
God how he plays it
Gabriel plays it, let's hear him play it

It's number one, all over heaven
It's number one, all over heaven
It's number one, all over heaven
The number one song all over heaven

The song filters down, down through the clouds
It reaches the earth and winds all around
And then it breaks up in millions of ways

It goes la, la, la......

In cars it becomes a hit
In your homes it becomes advertisements
And in the streets it becomes the children singing...

"The Rhythm Thief"



I am the rhythm thief
Say goodbye to the beat
I am the rhythm thief
Auf wiedersehen to the beat

Oh no, where did the groove go, where did the groove go, where did the groove go?
Lights out, Ibiza
Where did the groove go, where did the groove go, where did the groove go?

You'll never get it back, you'll never get it back,
The rhythm thief has got it and you'll never get it back
You'll never get it back, you'll never get it back,
The rhythm thief has got it and you'll never get it back
You'll never get it back, you'll never get it back,
The rhythm thief has got it and you'll never get it back

Lights out, Ibiza
I am the rhythm thief
Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye

"The Scene"


Some people love to be alone
Some people love to be in railway stations
Some people live by bread alone
Some people revel in hallucinations
Some people always have a comb

Step up, step up, and all aboard

The scene
The floors are shaking
The blood is pumping
The skin is baking
Can you take it, can you take it
You look tough, but that's not enough
It's the scene

Oh no it's not enough

Some people live to work all day
Some people only live for monkey business
Dressed in some Cadillac coupe
They go out slumming as they burn their bridges
And all the while they act blase

Step up, step up, and all aboard

[Chorus]

Is you is or is you ain't
Oh yeah
Who's a sinner who's a saint
Oh yeah
Is you just a little vain
Oh yeah
Well, shut my mouth we're both the same

Is you or is you ain't
Oh yeah oh yeah
Wanna take a holiday
Oh yeah oh yeah
To a land that's got no rain
Oh yeah oh yeah
Then hop aboard that rhythm train

End of the story never ends
There'll be a world without extended mixes
There'll be a world without champagne
There'll be a world without those kind of kisses
But then this may not ever end

Step up, step up and all aboard

[Chorus 3x]

"The Studio Commissary"


[THE STUDIO CHIEF:]
Well, Mr. Bergman, have you made your decision?
But before you answer, perhaps you are hungry. Let’s go into the
commissary.

Ah, Ingmar Bergman, look around, and hear the happy happy sound
Directors of all size and shapes are eating steak and
munching cake
Directors of a foreign stripe who’ve done quite well,
see if they gripe
Their vision made it here unscathed, none felt a whore,
none felt he caved

Ha ha ha ha ha ha

Ah, Billy Wilder, sure you say, he had to come, no other way
But Sunset Boulevard and such, I’d say we let him keep his touch
And there, Fritz Lang, an émigré, who managed to do films his way
Perhaps less stylized, so true, but then Fritz Lang, he isn’t you

Ha ha ha ha ha ha

And Alfred Hitchcock, bless his soul, there chomping on a
dinner roll
The Man Who Knew Too Much done twice, in Hollywood,
done twice as nice
And Jacques Tourneur, Cat People, great, Simone Simon,
right here, so great
And Murnau, genius just like you, made Sunrise, top ten in my view
Of all the films made anywhere and yet he made it here not there
And Elgar Ulmer made Detour, a classic if you love film noir
Von Sternberg’s eating all alone, let’s say hello, hey, Josef, phone!
The point I guess is all had fears, the fears you have, these
noble peers
And one could quibble which was best their Old World work or
work out west
The differences are subtle, though, the language, sure,
but still you know
That English is the common tongue of cinema, when said
or sung

Ha ha ha ha ha
Ha ha ha ha ha

So please, dear Ingmar, think tonight, be sure the choice you
make is right
But there’s a table, have a seat, and here’s a menu, bon appétit

"The Toughest Girl In Town"



She won't marry you
She don't look good in white
Don't try sweet talk
Unless you're hot for a fight
Still there's something that
Drives the guys half-insane
Ain't they heard that their love
For her is in vain

And all the guys in town
Just love to hang around
The toughest girl in town

Look outside and you'll see
The rain pouring down
That's the sign that
She's now on your side of town
Plan your life around
Someone proper and clean
That's the smart thing
But that means nothing to me

And all the guys in town
Just love to hang around
The toughest girl in town

She's not evil
She's just a little confused
All here life she's been
Set upon and abused
Given that, she's more interesting
Than the rest
Given that, she's the one
Who I love the best

And all the guys in town
Just love to hang around
The toughest girl in town

"The Very Next Fight"



The very next fight
I have over you
Will end up the same
It's always the same

The very next fight
From out of the blue (it's always the same)
Will end up the same
It's always the same (it's always the same)

Some idiot staring at your legs, I know
You quietly tell me I should let it go
But how can I let it go
When I can't control myself
How can I let it go
When I can not help myself

The very next fight
I have over you
Will end up the same
It's always the same

The very next fight
From out of the blue (it's always the same)
Will end up the same
It's always the same (it's always the same)

Blood on the floor of some posh restaurant
Deep down I'm sure this is what you want
And what you want, is what I want.
What you want is what I want.

Open displays of affection

The very next fight
From out of the blue (it's always the same)
Will end up the same
It's always the same (it's always the same)

Some idiot staring at your legs, I know
You quietly tell me I should let it go
But how can I let it go
When I can't control myself
How can I let it go
When I can not him myself

The very next fight
I have over you
Will end up the same
It's always the same

The very next fight (it's always the same)
From out of the blue (it's always the same)
Will end up the same (it's always the same)
It's always the same (it's always the same)

"The Willys"



It started on a Tuesday
It must have been that lunch meat
I haven't been intimate
And anyway, I'm careful
(We know what you got, boy)
(We know what you got, boy)
(We know what you got, boy)

They call it the Willys
They call it the Willys
You shiver and shake
You're doin' Swan Lake
All over the place

Has everyone gone Christian
Well, glory Hallelujah
But I'm beyond salvation
I haven't got a prayer
(The Willys do this to ya)
(The Willys do this to ya)
(The Willys do this to ya, to ya)

They call it the Willys
They call it the Willys
It's hard to explain
Like Citizen Kane
To someone who's blind

They call it the Willys
They call it the Willys
You shiver and shake
You're doin' Swan Lake
All over the place

(We know what you got boy, we know what
you got boy, we know what you got boy)

(Physically)
Physically, I'm splendid
(Mentally)
Mentally, I'm splendid
(Morally)
Morally he is lax
And maybe that's the problem
(We know what you got boy)
(We know what you got boy)
(We know what you got boy, what you got)

They call it the Willys
They call it the Willys
You shiver and shake
You're doin' Swan Lake
All over the place
They call it the Willys
They call it the Willys
They call it the Willys

(The Willys do this to you)
(The Willys do this to you)
(The Willys do this to you, to you)

(We know what you got, boy)
(We know what you got, boy)
(We know what you got, boy, what you got
what you got, what you got)

They call it the Willys
They call it the Willys
You shiver and shake
You're doin' Swan Lake
All over the place

They call it the Willys
They call it the Willys
I'm speaking Chinese
I'm swinging from trees
I'm wearing your gowns

"There's No Such Thing As Aliens"



No, no, no, no
No, no, no, no

There's No Such Thing As Aliens
There's No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No, no, no, no

Look, look, look, look, out the door
Look, look, look, look, out the window every night
Look, look, look, look, out the door
Look, look, look, look, out the window every night

There's No Such Thing As Aliens
There's No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No, no, no, no

There's No Such Thing As Aliens
There's No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No, no, no, no

Look, at your watch
Look, at your TV in dispel
Look, at your watch
Look, at your TV it's a fell

Look, out the door
Look, out the window every night

There's No Such Thing As Aliens
There's No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No, no, no, no

There's No Such Thing As Aliens
There's No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No Such Thing As Aliens
No, no, no, no
No, no, no, no
No, no, no, no

"This Is The Renaissance"



Middle ages sucked
Spent all day in prayer
Judgement Day was everyday and
Witches burning everywhere
But now we are in luck
Beauties everywhere
Paintings filled with foxy women
No one's got a cross to bear

This is the Renaissance
Came upon us all at once
Oh what a Renaissance
This is the Renaissance
Renaissance or Renai'ssance
It's still a Renaissance

If you like to read
Man, you are in luck
Gutenberg is cranking out The Bible with a centrefold
So let it all hang out
No one's gonna care
Flash a little ankle and the guys will lose their self-control

Cause this is the Renaissance
Came upon us all at once
Oh what a Renaissance
This is the Renaissance
Renaissance or Renai'ssance
It's still a Renaissance

Science is here
Nothing left to fear
Though the Earth is flat
It's not as flat as we feared
Music's gone wild
No Gregorian here

Contrapuntal music is the music that your parents fear

This is the Renaissance
Oh what a Renaissance
This is the Renaisssance
Oh what a Renaissance

"Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls
Welcome to The Renaissance
The dawning of a new day
Where every man is a king and every woman a queen

This is the Renaissance
What a Renaissance
This is the Renaissance
This is the Renaissance
What a Renaissance
This is the Renaissance

We can see the moon
We can see the stars
We can see the future and
The freeways and electric cars
And they might think we're quaint
We don't really care
We've got Michaelangelo and they graffiti everywhere

Cause this is the Renaissance
Came upon us all at once
Oh what a Renaissance
This is the Renaissance
Renaissance or Renai'ssance
It's still a Renaissance

It's still a Renaissance

"This Town Ain't Big Enough For Both Of Us"



Zoo time is she and you time
The mammals are your favourite type, and you want her tonight
Heartbeat, increasing heartbeat
You hear the thunder of stampeding rhinos, elephants and tacky tigers

This town ain't big enough for both of us
And it ain't me who's gonna leave

Flying, domestic flying
And when the stewardess is near do not show any fear
Heartbeat, increasing heartbeat
You are a khaki-coloured bombardier, it's Hiroshima that you're nearing

This town ain't big enough for both of us
And it ain't me who's gonna leave

Daily, except for Sunday
You dawdle in to the cafe where you meet her each day
Heartbeat, increasing heartbeat
As twenty cannibals have hold of you, they need their protein just like you do

This town ain't big enough for both of us
And it ain't me who's gonna leave

Shower, another shower
You've got to look your best for her and be clean everywhere
Heartbeat, increasing heartbeat
The rain is pouring on the foreign town, the bullets cannot cut you down

This town ain't big enough for both of us
And it ain't me who's gonna leave

Census, the latest census
There'll be more girls who live in town though not enough to go round
Heartbeat, increasing heartbeat

You know that: This town isn't big enough, not big enough for both of us
This town isn't big enough, not big enough for both of us
And I ain't gonna leave

"Those Mysteries"


Why is there time?
Why is there space?
Why are there dogs and cats and trees and the human race?
And why am I here and not over there?
Oh why, oh why?

And why are there nuns?
And why do they pray?
And where do we go when we pass away?
And why, when I ask my Dad does he say
- Go ask your Mom or just go away?
And OK, I'll go away
But they won't go away

Those mysteries
Tomorrow I'll find out all I should know
Those mysteries
I don't even know what I don't even know
Those mysteries
They're hanging 'round and around and 'round and 'round

Those mysteries
Tomorrow I'll find out all I should know
Those mysteries
I don't even know what I don't even know
Those mysteries
They're hanging 'round and around and 'round and 'round

Why is there you?
Why is there me?
Why does my Mother kiss my Father occasionally?
And why am I sore whenever I'm hit?
Oh why, oh why?

And why is there France?
And why is there Spain?
And why am I here and why is there rain?
And why when I ask my Dad does he say
- Go ask your Mom or just go away?
And OK, I'll go away
But they won't go away

Those mysteries
Tomorrow I'll find out all I should know
Those mysteries
I don't even know what I don't even know
Those mysteries
They're hanging 'round and around and 'round and 'round

Those mysteries
Tomorrow I'll find out all I should know
Those mysteries
I don't even know what I don't even know
Those mysteries
They're hanging 'round and around and 'round and 'round

Why is there time?
Why is there space?

"Throw Her Away (And Get A New One)"



Just like everything else in this world
Time wreaks havoc on every girl
What do you do, what do you do,
what do you do?

Throw her away and get a new one

If you've got a girl with elegant taste
It's only a matter of time
Bowling or root beer or taking the train
A girl in her decline

Throw her away and get a new one,
Throw her away and get a new one,
Throw her away and get a new one,
a new one

Just like everything else in this world
Changes come to the strongest of girls
What do you do, what do you do,
what do you do?

Throw her away and get a new one

Now may we present, she's the top of
the line a 1959
In top notch shape, but it's always
the same
It's only a matter of time

Throw her away and get a new one,
Throw her away and get a new one,
Throw her away and get a new one,
a new one

If you've got a girl, better look at her waist
If you've got a girl, better check out her face
Or maybe it's only a change in your taste

Throw her away and get a new one,
Throw her away and get a new one,
Throw her away and get a new one,
a new one

"Tips For Teens"


I've got a snapshot of your Aunt Maureen
She's 90 and you're a teen
I'm trying to cheer you up
Don't be so mean, don't be so mean

Crach, bam, now you're looking good
Tip Top, now you're feeling good
Once more, here's your Aunt Maureen
Don't you feel good, don't you feel good

[Chorus:]
Tips For Teens, Tips For Teens, the kind
you don't see in magazines
Tips For Teens, Tips For Teens, the kind
you don't see on T.V. screens
Tips For Teens, Tips For Teens
Wake up to music
And say you're too sick to go to work

Soon, you will lose all your zits
Tight sweaters no longer fit
Jetsetters will make their pitch
I told you so, I told you so

[Chorus]

Don't eat that ice cream
It is vanilla
Give it to me

Don't eat that pastry
What's in the middle
Give it to me

Don't eat that burger
Has it got mayonnaise
Give it to me

Keep that mystique up
And wear a "D" cup
No matter what

Don't eat no curry
Before a very
Important date

Do I look so knowing and old and wise
Maby it's those Dacron ties
How come you keep asking me
For Tips For Teens, for Tips For Teens

Crach, bam, now you're looking good
Tip Top, now you're feeling good
Once more, here's your Aunt Maureen
Don't you feel good, don't you feel good

[Chorus]

"Tits"


Harry, it's good of you to stay
Hear every word I say
And not just duck away

God, these drinks are something warm and watered down
Barkeep, how 'bout some ice
Hey, Harry sit back down
Say, that little thing there's fine from behind

They all look good after three or four,
So drink Harry, drink Harry, drink 'til you can't see no more
of anything, no more of anything
Drink Harry, drink Harry, drink 'til you can't see no more

For months, for years,
Tits were once a source of fun and games at home
And now she says, tits are only there to feed our little Joe
So that he'll grow

Harry, it's really rough at home
I've caught her on the phone
Hey, who's that on the phone?
Oh, that's no one dear,
The standard sort of line
Harry, you know me well,
You know that I'm not blind
Hey, you ain't been drinking
Don't you know I'm buying?

They all taste good after three or four
So drink Harry, drink Harry, drink 'til you can't drink no more
of anything, no more of anything
Drink Harry, drink 'til you can't drink no more

How well I know
Tits were once a source of fun and games at home
And now she says, tits are only there to feed our little Joe
So that he'll grow

God, the room is spinning round
Hey, drive me home old pal
God, you sure get around
Harry, I know it's you who's breaking up my home
Harry, don't say a word, just drop me off at home
Harry, forgive me Harry, let's have just one more

It's all so good after three or four
It's all so good after three or four
It's all so good after three or four

So let's drink Harry, drink 'til we can't drink no more
of anything, no more of anything
Drink Harry, drink Harry, drink 'til we can't drink no more

How well I know
Tits were once a source of fun and games at home
And now she says, tits are only there to feed our little Joe
So that he'll grow into a man

So let's drink Harry, drink 'til we can't see no more, [etc]

"Tryouts For The Human Race"


We're just a gleam in lover's eyes, steam on sweaty bodies in the night
One of us might make it through, the rest will disappear like dew
Pressure building, gettin' hot, give it, give it, give it all you got
When that love explosion comes, my, oh my, we want to be someone

[CHORUS]
Tryouts for the human race, from Burlington to Bonn
Ah, we are a quarter billion strong
Tryouts for the human race, from twilight time 'til dawn
We just want to be someone

We're the future and the past, we're the only way you're gonna last
We're just pawns in a funny game, tiny actors in the oldest play
It's an angry sea we face, just to get the chance to join the race
Gotta make it, gotta try, gotta get the chance to live and die

[CHORUS]

We must, we must, we must leave from here
We must, we must, we must, we must leave from here
Gotta make our play, gotta get away
Gotta make our play, gotta get away
Gotta make our play, gotta get away
Gotta make our play
Let us out of here, let us out of here, let us out of here

We just want to feel the sun and be your little daughter or your son
We're just words that lovers use, words that light that automatic fuse
When that love explosion comes, my, oh my, we want to be someone

[CHORUS]

"Tsui Hark"
(feat. Tsui Hark & Bill Kong)



I'm Tsui Hark, I'm a film director
I'm Tsui Hark, I'm a film director
I've made several films
I'm Tsui Hark, I'm a film director
I've won several awards for my films
My first film was
The Butterfly Murders
Shanghai Blues
Peking Opera Blues
Swordsman, Part 1, Part 2, Part 3
Chinese Ghost Story, Part 1, Part 2, Part 3
Once Upon a Time In China, Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5
And several other films
I'm Tsui Hark, I'm a film director
I've made several films
I'm Tsui Hark, I'm a film director
I've won several awards for my films

[Cantonese lyrics:]
"Mgoy my dan" (the bill please)
"Yat Yee San Say Ng Lok Chat Baat Gao Sarp" (1 to 10)
"Tsimshatsui" (an area of Hong Kong

"Ugly Guys With Beautiful Girls"



Ugly guys with beautiful girls
You always know what the story is
Beautiful girls with ugly guys
What do they take us for anyway?
Ugly guys, with beautiful girls
Ugly guys with beautiful girls
As they walk down the street arm in arm
I see them
And once again feel the need to ask myself the question
The question that has weighed heavily on me of late
How is it possible that a guy and a girl
So dissimilar in physical appearance,
There being such a disparity in how attractive each is,
Be nonetheless in what would appear to be a relationship?

It ain't done with smoke and mirrors
It ain't done with smoke and mirrors
It ain't done with smoke and mirrors
Ugly guys with beautiful girls
Ugly guys with beautiful girls
Ugly guys with beautiful girls

How do we explain this?
An attraction of opposites?
No, that theory has been refuted
By many experts in the fields of human psychology
A much greater attraction seems to come
from one more similar to oneself
Personality perhaps?
Without intending to sound judgmental
That he doesn't look like
What was once called "live wire" or "the life of the party"
He appears rather expressionless.
His movements are stiff and even awkward
Perhaps he's a person of some intellect
An expert in science
The arts, political theory?
No, I think not.
See how well tailored his clothes are
How well cut his hair is

It ain't done with smoke and mirrors
It ain't done with smoke and mirrors
It ain't done with smoke and mirrors
Ugly guys with beautiful girls
Ugly guys with beautiful girls
Ugly guys with beautiful girls

I must confess to you, my listeners
That I have been a little less than honest
In pretending I had no answers to my previous questions
You see, I lost someone very dear to me
Someone very beautiful
To someone much like him
Ah, you ask, surely there must have been other areas
Where you were deficient and he was not
No, I don't believe so
My shortcomings were of an economic nature
He was rich, I was not
You see, I underestimated the appeal to her of things
Imported things on wheels
Large things with manicured lawns and
Olympic swimming pools
Things to wear around her neck that would
Glisten in the night light
Things!

Still I am not bitter
Rather, I am an observer
Who saw first hand how life may not be fair
Would things have turned out differently
Between me and her
Had I moved the corporate ladder quicker
Been born of more noble stock
Or done better on one of our journeys to Las Vegas?

Perhaps.
In fact, I am certain of it.
Things would have turned out differently
Between me and her
I know this now

It ain't done with smoke and mirrors
Ugly guys with beautiful girls
You always know what the story is

"Under The Table With Her"


Nobody miss diminutive offspring
Not when there's big wigs there, there
Dinner for twelve is now dinner for ten
'Cause I'm under the table with her

I give a yelp and they throw me a cutlet
Somebody pats her hair, hair
Everyone's nice to the subhuman species
I'm under the table with her

People all around the world are having only rice and tea
Two of them should come and take the place of Laura Lee and me

[repeat]

"Underground"



Why don't you please go with me underground
Down under seas, you and me underground
Once I dreamed I was on a basement tape
Took in just one take
Oh Lord, we gained our world distribution by relevant means
Jazz folk-rock fusion appealed to the teens

Why don't ya please go with me underground
Where love is free and super groups can be found

Take the plunge now deep into the earth
Where heavy sets do lurk
Oh you and I and mystery follows close at our heels
Whispering secrets and travelling concealed
Down under cities and the roots of the trees
Oh how I love you in times such as these

We shall sail off over rainbows till we spy the lands that come together
Smiles will greet us, heads will turn to meet us as we make the scene, as we would make the scene

Oh won't you please go with me underground
Oh won't you please go with me underground
Oh won't you please please

"Upstairs"


Man there's so much stuff up here
A quarter pound of lean ideas
Half a pound of dirty jokes
One pound of non-essential quotes

It's where the dreamin' starts (Upstairs)
It's where the jokin' starts (Upstairs)
You got some small ideas (Upstairs)
You got some big ideas (Upstairs)
It's where you calculate
It's where you speculate

[Chorus:]
Upstairs, Upstairs, why don't you get out of there
Upstairs, Upstairs, why don't you get out of there
Upstairs, Upstairs, why don't you get out of my head

You are low on foreign words
Better meet a foreign girl
Take a foreign girl upstairs
And learn a lot of foreign words

A little enchante (Upstairs)
A little hey, ole (Upstairs)
Ich heisse Billy Boy (Upstairs)
A little soya sauce (Upstairs)
You got some big ideas
You got some big ideas

[Chorus]

When you want the art to start
You cue the left side and the art will
Start to flow and flow and flow
And leave a stain on all your carpets

[Chorus]

When you want the intellect
You cue the right side and you can
Collect the Nobel Prize in person
Or have someone mail it to you

[Chorus]

Crammed with common phobias
Still, it's a utopia
This is where you kill a guy
And you know he's still alive

[Chorus]